Friends with Capital "F"

Su has a baby boy, I am happy for her.

I live in a world of blackout news, where people seldom tell me anything. Whatever I know, it is often by chance, when others happened to talk in front of me. I suppose I am glad that others gossip haha.


I really appreciate Nd for passing the news. Not hearing anything about her since she went on maternity leave, this is a most welcome news for me. I am ashamed to say that I cried on hearing the good news, tears of joy that I couldn't hold back. As to me, she has meant alot, even if she didn't accept my friendship. I wish I can be there to congratulate her, to share her joy. But it doesn't matter. All I want is her happiness. It is all that matter.

There was this articles in Mind Your Body, a supplement of the Straits Times, about friendship. Or rather about companionship which most people took liberally as friendship. It quotes Aristotle's analysis of the love that exists between friends, about friendships of utility, friendships of pleasure and perfect friendship. The articles only summaries briefly, but it is interesting. Maybe if I can find the book it mentioned, it may be worth to read.

Most "friendships" forged at work are really companionship. It is a friendship of utility. Real friends are friends that you wish to have for who they are. Though I may be guilty of wanting them for companionship, I have always accepted my friends for themselves, for who they are, not because they may be useful to me. I have always want to make them happy, more than I wish them to make me happy. Among those who have touched my heart, Yulie, Su and Nd will always have a special place in my heart that is reserved for friends with a capital "F". And that space is enough for a few more, which I have found too, though some I have not met them.

"There is no doubt that companionship is a good thing; and companions are friends, of a sort. But they are friends with a small "f" - no no substitute for the intimate friends we all want and need."

For me, the friendship I seek is a capital "F", and though I found them, I couldn't have that friendship.

Aristotle says: "Without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods."

In a way, I agree with him. My family, my friends and my dance ... 3 things that I need, one less and my world is not complete. My dance world currently is not entirely satisfactory to me for I still feel cripple. I only have my family ... but without any real friend, I feel lonely.

Haiz ... I can only accept my fate ...