To be able to join the girls ...

Someone changed shift with me so she can go have a girl's night out. I wish I could join as well. Afterall, two of them I have treated as my "friends". I have only my colleagues to depend on if I want a group outing. But they don't involve me in their outing. I guess I can't expect them to accept me since I am not part of their circle of friends.

Why do people have girl's night out? Why can't it just be friends? I rather be able to join the girls than the guys. Not that I have any guy's nite out in the first place haha. What matter is who one will be comfortable with. And what they can share in common. I seldom see guys going out for lunch meet when I went out with my dear for set lunches. Often I see a group of ladies. I wish I have a lunch buddies beside my dear to go with. Of course she can join along too. I like group makan session, I can share their meals too hehe. I am always the official person for any leftover in my family haha.

Somehow, I enjoy more having female companions, as friends and confidante. Sometimes I wish I am a female too, so they can easily accept me. But I am not. And I don't have any female buddies who will let me join them in their outings. Haiz ...

Weekend is here. I got one more day to work on Sunday, then I will be away from my workplace for a week. I need the break. But if only I can go KL. But they don't want to, and it will not be fun going alone. I think I have lost the urge to do things alone. Maybe I should find it back. Since that seem to be the direction I am left with. And to keep my sanity.

There is only so much I can do with my dear, and there are times she is not keen on what I want to do. Neither are the kids. Maybe I do need to go clubbing alone, go on trip alone, if I am to avoid my frustration from building up. Is this what married life is about? Doing things alone when the family doesn't want to join you? And you got no friends? I have tried to avoid that for many years, giving up what I want for the family sake. I still will I suppose, but inside me, I want to ....

But I don't know .. I am at a lost.....

I want to eat donut .. been screaming for it all week. Weeks actually haha. Okay, I did had one last week, but .... still want more donuts, sooooo, will get a dozen or two ...

Enuff said!